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The Reproductive Health (RH) Bill

A few years ago, 1998 to be exact, a bill was proposed. It claimed to help everyone know everything there is to know about family planning, to promote equality between men and women, and to put it bluntly, providing the country with reproductive healthcare. In recent times the debate/discussion has resurfaced, putting college students in uncomfortable ‘wtf’ situations. With growing up in a one-sided system, Filipino college students are being trained to think and speak rationally, and are expected to know about current events. That is where the debate comes in–the teachers want us to give our opinions on the debate and at the same time train us for similar future events. This blogger says: Fuck that. I mean seriously, what would Jesus Himself say?

Oh. Right.

Seriously, when I heard the contents of the bill, I was all up for it. It really sounded good; promotion of family planning, cheap reproductive healthcare services, even freedom!


Well actually, freedom of ‘informed choice’. If you guys want to read the bill, you can read it here. As I read through it, I was initially pissed– I kept hearing people talk about abortion and how it’s stupid for the bill to legalized it, when in fact the bill fucking states that, “While nothing in this Act changes the law on abortion, as abortion remains a crime and is punishable…” However, I found out that the bill contained loopholes larger than that shit you find in Swiss Cheese. Please note these views are completely my own, and not of anyone else’s affiliated with my name.


1. Wow… just wow…

This isn’t actually a loophole, but fuck it– the second point isn’t much of a loophole either. The whole bill kept going on and on about how everything in the fucking thing would help the ‘underprivileged sectors’. (Un)Surprisingly, I found the bill to be as helpful as using pieces of cactus as toilet paper. How in the fucking world will the bill help? Oh sure, women and men would be ‘equal’ and women wouldn’t need to sterilize themselves for certain jobs. In addition, they speculate a decrease in unwanted pregnancies.

Yes ma'am, we're spending all of your hard-earned tax money just to tell you not to fuck.

But we’re missing the point here. It’s most probable that the powers behind this bill are intentionally using the statement as an excuse ‘just because’. In fact, it barely does any service to the urban poor. Sure, I mean doing away with unwanted pregnancies sounds awesome, but take a look at the facts. Those people would still stay in that same wretched situation. They’ll still remain in that state of squalor, in where they’d sleep in a one room shack (if they’re lucky) and barely survive each day. It’s really fucking stupid to say you’re helping the poor, when in fact you’re shelling millions of pesos just to tell them why they’re poor, and not really helping them get out of that situation. In short, this bill does not in any fucking way help the unfortunate. Oh wait, what about the rich or middle class citizens?

Hm… let’s see. You can get jobs now more easily if you’re a woman, you have the right and freedom to carry around cheap birth control devices. Note: they’re cheap, not free. Okay, but there’s no abortion. Alright, I think we have the facts right here; let’s tick them out one by one.

Jobs: You will now be chosen based on your experience, your degrees, but not on your gender. Oh that’s right you have to go to school, college, then a master’s course. Crap, middle class citizens can barely afford to go to those awesome universities. Let’s move on.

Cheap birth control: Well, in today’s growing economy birth control seems very expensive. Thank God for the bill. Hey, wait, we still need to buy those, and oh shit, companies need to buy them too to distribute around the whole place. Gosh darn it, now the government gets more money– the companies buy the product, the sales of birth control items rise, the government taxes the birth control industry even more. Oh fiddlesticks.

No abortion: Oh my Jesus! Yes! Due to the Philippines being dominantly Catholic, we’re not allowed to abort our unwanted babies! This is definitely a good thing! Wo0o0o0o0o0o0o0!

Oh shit wait– wasn’t abortion already illegal?

So those this mean it doesn’t help anyone at all?! Aw man…

2. Passing the parcel


“While nothing in this Act changes the law on abortion, as abortion remains a crime and is punishable…”

As stated at the beginning of this post, abortion is still considered illegal. Now scroll down to Section 21 (Prohibited Acts), No. 5, and check it out.

Refuse to extend reproductive health care services and information on account of the patient’s civil status, gender or sexual orientation, age, religion, personal circumstances, and nature of work; Provided, That all conscientious objections of health care service providers based on religious grounds shall be respected: Provided, further, That the conscientious objector shall immediately refer the person seeking such care and services to another health care service provider within the same facility or one which is conveniently accessible”

What this bill is stating is that if you do not want to give your patients ‘reproductive healthcare’ due to some apparent reason (abortion is a type of reproductive health and is still freaking illegal) then you must and should refer the patient to another doctor. If that doctor also feels strongly about it, then he (again) should and must refer her to another doctor. She’ll go bouncing from one doctor to another until someone treats her. If not, then the hospitals will be freaking penalized for turning away a patient. All this while, abortion is still fucking illegal! A doctor’s views on a pregnant mother will drastically change– she’s a ticking time bomb. Teenage moms will face even harder criticism. No doctor would want to see one, due to the freaking reason of the doctor expecting her to ask for an abortion– they’ll be passed around more times than the damn tape in ‘The Ring’.

Only God can save us now...


3. Finally! We’ve been waiting for a real loophole!

Yep, here it is. The biggest beef I have with the RH Bill.

Really Christopher? That's the best joke you could come up with at this given situation?


The thing that makes me want to take a crap on the fucking bill, is this:-

“one (1) month to six (6) months or a fine ranging from Ten Thousand Pesos (P10,000.00) to Fifty Thousand Pesos (P50,000.00) or both such fine and imprisonment at the discretion of the court.”

Ten to fifty thousand pesos and jail time. Hey, I mean that seems fair, considering the bill is just for taking care of vaginas! C’mon you guys, fifty grand and 6 months in jail as a penalty? Oh that’s right, there should be reasons behind it. So people will be penalized if:-

1. “Any person maliciously engages in disinformation about the intent or provisions of this Act.”– So like what I’m doing right now? Like I want you guys to have a different perspective of the Act, see another side to it. I’m writing this post in hopes of ultimately destroying the bill cause heck, it sucks. In fact it’s me voicing out my opinions. Does this mean they’re limiting freedom of speech? A REPUBLICAN COUNTRY?! Where people should be able to VOICE OUT THEIR OPINIONS?! 



2. “Knowingly withhold information or impede the dissemination thereof, and/or intentionally provide incorrect information regarding programs and services on reproductive health…“– Note, this only goes to heath care service providers. So if you’re a ‘health care service provider’, and your child comes up to you with a question on sex, you have to answer him/her. ‘Cause well, the prohibitions do not in any way mention specifics. Nope, you have to tell your child about sex at any given fucking time. Why? Because it’s the law. If you’re knowingly withholding information, you could be sent to jail. Yes, you will be forced to finally have that talk with your child about the birds and the bees, just by your sweet, precious angel asking about it. Oh, and you need to have the unlucky job of being a ‘health service provider’.

3. The Unseen Prohibition— So think about it. Your daughter walks into the room, and throws her bag unto the floor. There was a small tiny rip within the bag, that became huge due to the sudden impact and the amount of godknowswhatgirlscarry shit in there. IN other words, the fucking bag bursts open. Out come several items– a make-up box, a small pack of condoms, a diary, a deodorant bottle, and you’re fuming at the bitch for screwing up that beautiful, expensi- what the fuck? CONDOMS?! You immediately pick the pack up and verify. Yep, they’re condoms. “I’m taking them away from you, you friggin whore!” you cry. Suddenly swarms of cops raid your house and take you away, locking you up for six whole months, for intervening with the law.

Yes, readers, taking away contraceptives is in direct violation of the whole Act. The Act’s main goal is to spread around contraceptives like jam to bread. Not a spot should be untouched. With taking away any form of contraceptive, you’re taking away your child’s righlyhood (is that even a word?). The law is on his/her side– you’re messing with the fucking law or to make things simple, being a cock blocker to the Act. And shit, you know what the government does to cock blockers right?   

See that hole right there? It's not for your neck...


My opinion? I think they should rewrite this shit. OR better yet, make something that actually helps the country. For you guys still out there that say, ‘Oh, but they’re trying to reduce pregnancies. That’s helping out the Philippines. We’re over populated.’ Let me tell you what the fuck I think about it. That’s bullshit. With the money they’re paying off for the ACt to commence, they could come up with new jobs so more uneducated people can work AND help the country at the same time. They could make use of the wide expanses of fertile fields that are just lying there with overgrown weeds– like expanding Metro Manila, or some other place. When people have money, they don’t need to make huge families so as to make more money. But what of teenage pregnancies you ask? Stop putting shit up on TV that depict love and… yeah fuck that’s all the movies that are coming out about– love. Or better yet, try investing in censorship. I could fucking watch a fucking movie with fucking in it and I’m 16!

*Sigh* Sometimes Christopher just can’t control his foul use of language. Despicable. Anyway, this has probably been his longest post yet. In celebration of that, he’s decided to open up a new blog with his cousin– it’s all about gaming. Check it out,  


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